How to understand the real culture

I've noticed that the moment I want to understand an organisation's real culture, I don't look at their values statement. I look at what goes unchallenged.

What behaviour do people actually get away with?

What mistakes are forgiven and what mistakes end careers?

What do people do when nobody's watching, and what does that tell you about what's actually valued?

Because culture isn't built by what you say matters. It's built by what you visibly tolerate, reward, and ignore.

I've walked into organisations with inspiring values statements on the wall, and witnessed behaviours that were cynical, siloed, and defensive. I've also walked into small companies with no formal values, but where the culture was clearly aligned and strong because leaders were consistently modelling what they cared about.

Your culture is exactly what you're willing to tolerate. If you want a culture of openness, you have to visibly respond well when people are honest. If you want accountability, you have to hold it, fairly but firmly.

What's getting tolerated in your organisation right now that you don't actually want there?